Completely inappropriate lack of emotional support and insensitivity by someone who should have been there when I finally choose to share just further heightened my sense of betrayal and unfortunately prompted me to erect thicker, higher walls around my heart. I'm sad it took so many years to realize those walls were not the answer. For as I sought to protect with my own devices, I blocked and pushed away so many blessings. Thankfully I finally saw that God's protection was superior and He is well able. But "barriers" are plural and sometimes take years to remove.
For years I hid and withheld a public online presence, believing that would give me a sense of power over him -- not allowing him access to me.
It is so liberating and encouraging to know that I have a greater power now, a power and strength to be free and to not care any longer about such hiding. I'm singing my fight song (see video below).
The decluttering process I've been sharing with you is also involving the removal barriers from around my heart and I look forward to connecting and experiencing greater depths of genuine love in the many relationships that are right in front of my face.